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Ladies gather ’round like it’s time for talk. Whether you’re sipping chai in Southall or enjoying plantain chips in Peckham, let’s dish about men. How can women in relationships support their kings?
In our vibrant African cultures, from the bustling streets of Lagos to the quiet neighborhoods of Toronto, we often focus on how men should cherish their women. But today, we’re flipping the script like a perfect egusi soup in the pot.
How women in relationships can support their men is crucial for building stronger partnerships. It’s not about being a doormat, sisters – it’s about creating a home as warm and inviting.

1. Communicate openly and effectively
How women in relationships can support their men starts with communication smoother than shea butter. Channel the energy of those market women who can haggle for hours, but make it snappy!
- Be direct: Don’t expect him to read your mind like a juju man. If his snoring is driving you mad, tell him straight up.
- Listen actively: When he’s talking about his struggles at work or his dreams of opening an Afrobeat club, put down that phone and listen like it’s the latest Ayra Starr track.
- Use “I” statements: Instead of “You never help with the fufu pounding,” try “I feel overwhelmed when I have to prepare all the traditional dishes alone.”
Pro tip: Set aside “talk time” each day, even if it’s just 15 minutes. It could be over suya and Star beer or while taking an evening stroll in the park.
2. Show appreciation and encouragement
How women in relationships can support their men includes being their biggest cheerleader. Think of yourself as the praise singer at a Nigerian wedding – loud, proud, and impossible to ignore!
- Compliment him: Notice when he looks fine in that dashiki or does something well. A simple “You’re looking sharp like Pap and Akara” can boost his confidence.
- Celebrate his wins: Whether he got a promotion or finally learned how to make egusi soup without burning it, show you’re proud of him like he just won the Africa Cup of Nations.
- Support his dreams: If he wants to start an African fusion restaurant or learn to play the talking drum, be his personal Motivational Speaker Wale Adenuga.
Remember: Just as you’d want him to hype you up when you’re rocking that new gele, he needs that energy too!
3. Respect and trust
In many African cultures, respect is more valuable than gold. How women in relationships can support their men often boils down to showing respect and trust like you would an elder.
- Don’t belittle him: Avoid criticizing him in public or comparing him unfavorably to other men. Don’t be telling your girlfriends he can’t dance azonto as well as your ex!
- Trust his decisions: If he says he’ll handle sending money back home to the family, let him. Micromanaging can be more demoralizing than finding a fly in your fufu.
- Respect his space: Whether it’s his “man cave” filled with Premier League posters or time with his boys at the local African pub, show that you trust him by giving him space when he needs it.
Think of it this way: You’re not his mama, you’re his queen. Treat him like the capable African king he is.

4. Encourage personal growth and self-care
How women in relationships can support their men includes nurturing their personal development. It’s like tending to a yam farm – with care and attention, it flourishes.
- Support his hobbies: Whether it’s playing football in the local African league or learning to code to build apps for the continent, shows interest in what he loves.
- Encourage health: Cooking nutritious meals (yes, even sneaking some vegetables into that pounded yam) or joining him for workouts shows you care about his well being.
- Push for therapy: In many African communities, mental health is more taboo than talking about juju. Break that cycle by encouraging him to talk to a professional if needed. It doesn’t make him less of a man – it makes him a healthier partner.
Remember: A rising tide lifts all boats. His growth is good for your relationship too, like adding more crayfish to our egusi soup!
Conclusion: How Women in Relationships Can Support and Empower Their Men
Sisters, how women in relationships can support their men isn’t about losing yourself. It’s about creating a partnership where both of you can shine brighter than the gold.
By communicating effectively, showing appreciation, respecting him, and encouraging his growth, you’re not just supporting him – you’re building a stronger relationship.
So, whether you’re navigating life in Brixton or the Bronx, remember these tips. Your relationship is like our pot of egusi soup – it takes time, effort, and the right ingredients to make it perfect. And just like that egusi we have been stirring, the results are finger-licking good!
After all, in the words of our ancestors, “The hand that gives is the hand that receives.” How will you support your African king today?
READ: The 2-2-2 Rule: A Simple System for Maintaining Romance in Marriage
Is your marriage feeling more like a business partnership than a love story? The 2-2-2 rule might be the spark you need to reignite that passion.
This simple system is designed to keep romance alive, whether you’re newlywed or celebrating your silver anniversary.
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Very nice of you to say. Thank you and stick around