| Getting your Trinity Audio player ready... |
You swipe right, but your nerves swipe left. In the age of TikTok, where connections are just a hashtag away, why do we still struggle to make meaningful relationships? Let’s dive into the world of missed connections and explore how to navigate social in the TikTok era
You’re curled up on your lumpy futon in your London flat, scrolling through TikTok when BAM! There’s your old classmate from Lagos Grammar School, now a big-shot lawyer in New York, doing the Killin’ It challenge in his corner office.
Your palms start to sweat. Should you double-tap? Drop a “congrats fam”? Or pretend you’re suddenly very interested in that sourdough tutorial that’s up next?
Welcome to the wild world of social anxiety in the TikTok era, where every thumb movement feels like it could make or break your social standing.
The Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) in the TikTok Era
You wake up at 3 AM, bleary-eyed but determined to catch the latest gist from back home. Your childhood bestie in Nairobi just posted a TikTok from the hottest new restaurant in town. Meanwhile, you’re eating day-old jollof rice in your pajamas. The FOMO is real, and it’s keeping you up at night.
Set boundaries with your TikTok time. Use the app’s “Digital Wellbeing” feature to limit your daily usage. Remember, you’re not missing out – you’re living your own unique story.
The Perfectionist’s Paralysis
You’ve spent three hours perfecting your Amapiano dance moves for your first TikTok. But just as you’re about to hit “Post,” panic sets in. What if your colleagues see it?
What if your moves aren’t as smooth as you thought? You end up scrapping the whole thing and posting a “safe” book review instead.
Embrace imperfection. Start with “low-stakes” content like joining a simple challenge or dueting a friend’s video. Remember, even the biggest TikTok stars had to start somewhere.
The Cultural Identity Crisis
One day you’re posting about your love for plantain chips, the next you’re sharing your obsession with Marmite (yes, you’ve gone there).
You’re worried about being “too African” for your British friends or “too oyinbo” for your family back in Ghana. The result? A TikTok feed that looks like a confused cultural potluck.
Own your unique blend of cultures. Create content that celebrates your multilayered identity. Start a series like “Diaspora Diaries” where you can explore these nuances with humor and honesty.
The Oversharing Conundrum
In a moment of vulnerability (or perhaps after one too many glasses of palm wine), you posted a heartfelt TikTok about your struggles with cultural adjustment.
Now you’re spiraling, convinced that your entire extended family is gossiping about you in the WhatsApp group.
Before posting personal content, wait 24 hours. If you still feel comfortable sharing after the “cooling period,” go for it. Remember, vulnerability can create genuine connections.
The Comparison Trap
Your cousin in Accra seems to be killing it as a tech entrepreneur, posting TikToks from swanky networking events.
Meanwhile, you’re still trying to figure out how to pronounce “Worcester” correctly. The comparison game is leaving you feeling like expired-age bread.
Create a “Wins” folder on your phone where you save screenshots of your personal and professional achievements, no matter how small. When the comparison blues hit, revisit this folder to remind yourself of your progress.
The Authenticity Struggle
You’ve created a TikTok persona that’s part Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, part Idris Elba, and part Trevor Noah. It’s exhausting to maintain, and you’re pretty sure your followers can smell the fakeness through their screens.
Start a “Real Talk” series where you share genuine moments from your day. Whether it’s struggling with a recipe from home or navigating cultural misunderstandings, let your true self shine.
The Language Barrier Blues
You want to spice up your TikToks with some Yoruba or Swahili, but you’re terrified of messing up and having the language police come for you in the comments. So you stick to the Queen’s English, feeling like a linguistic impostor.
Embrace the learning process. Start a series called “Language Lessons with [Your Name]” where you teach and learn phrases in your mother tongue. Involve your followers in the journey and laugh at the inevitable mix-ups.
The Generational Gap
You’re trying to explain to your mom why it’s important for her to duet your latest TikTok, while simultaneously convincing your younger cousin that no, you can’t “just quit your job and become a full-time content creator.”
Bridge the gap by creating multi-generational content. Film a “Teaching Grandma TikTok Dances” series or “Explaining African Proverbs to Gen Z.” It’s a fun way to connect across ages and gain unique content.
Conclusion: Navigating Social Anxiety in the TikTok Era
Remember, behind every seemingly perfect TikTok is someone probably battling their social anxieties. So take a deep breath, embrace your unique story, and don’t be afraid to hit that post button.
Whether you’re showcasing your fufu-making skills or your failed attempts at a British accent, your authentic self is your superpower in navigating social anxiety in the TikTok era.
Now go forth and create content that would make your ancestors proud (or at least highly confused).
READ: How to Cope with a Drug-Abusing Spouse: Essential Steps and Strategies
In this article, I’ll dish out some practical ways to deal with a spouse battling drug abuse, how to persuade them to get help, and most importantly, how to shield yourself from falling into the same trap.
