Ever get the feeling that your boss’s office is more like a throne room? Many people experience this and wonder if their boss is simply confident or something more—perhaps a narcissist. Let’s dive into five signs your boss might be a narcissist, and see if the shoe fits
Remember the project that went south, despite your team’s best efforts? Your boss, who was supposed to guide the project, pointed fingers at everyone but themselves.
They conveniently overlooked their role in the mishap and made sure the blame landed squarely on your shoulders.
If your boss constantly avoids responsibility and shifts blame, it’s a subtle sign that they might be a narcissist.
The Microphone Monopolizer
Your boss transforms every team meeting into a one-person show. They interrupt your presentation on the new client acquisition strategy to reminisce about their “revolutionary” ideas from five years ago.
Watch closely during the next office celebration. When Adebayo lands that huge contract, does your boss subtly steer the conversation back to their achievements?
If praise for others causes them visible discomfort – a tightening of the jaw, a forced smile – you’ve spotted a classic narcissist move.
The “Me, Myself, and I” Mentality
Pay attention to the language your boss uses. That successful merger? “I orchestrated it single-handedly.” The project that went south? “The team dropped the ball.”
A narcissistic boss claims victories like they’re the last bottle of champagne at a Nigerian wedding. But failures? Those get distributed faster than flyers on the streets of Accra.
They’ll take credit for your 2 AM strategy sessions without a hint of shame, acting like your sweat and brilliance were their divine inspiration.
The Empathy Wasteland
Your mother is ill back in Nairobi, and you need time off. Your boss responds with a long-winded story about how they once worked through malaria to close a deal.
Personal crisis? They’ll remind you about looming deadlines as if your emotions are an inconvenience. Narcissistic bosses have the emotional intelligence of a stone.
They can’t see past their desires, treating your life events as irritating distractions from their grand plans for world domination (or at least, company domination).
The Feedback Phobic
Suggest that the new marketing campaign might need tweaking, and watch your boss’s reaction. Do they consider your input, or do they bristle like you’ve insulted their ancestor’s cooking?
Narcissistic bosses treat constructive criticism like it’s a personal attack. They might snap at you, dismiss your concerns outright, or launch into a tirade about your shortcomings.
Their ego is more fragile than a soufflé in a windstorm. Notice how they handle criticism from important clients or the board of directors. A healthy leader seeks solutions; a narcissist hunts for scapegoats.
The Rule Bender Supreme
Office policy says no personal calls during meetings. Your boss’s phone never stops buzzing. Everyone else has to clock in by 9 AM sharp, but they stroll in at 10:30 without explanation.
A narcissistic boss believes rules are beneath them, like commoners in a feudal system. They might expense lavish lunches while scrutinizing your mileage claims. Watch for the double standards.
If “Exceptions for me, restrictions for thee” could be embroidered on their office wall, you’re likely dealing with a narcissist in a power suit.
Your Guide to Thriving Under a Narcissistic Boss in the African Diaspora
So, your boss’s ego rivals the size of Lake Victoria. Don’t despair. Here’s how to navigate these waters with the grace:
Document Like a Meticulous Historian
Channel your inner Chinua Achebe and become a master chronicler. Use apps like Evernote or Google Keep to record every interaction.
When your boss claims they conceptualized the successful “Taste of Home” food delivery app targeting homesick diaspora Africans, you’ll have timestamped notes proving it was your brainchild.
Perfect the Art of Tactical Flattery
Learn to praise strategically, like a griot weaving tales of ancient kings. “Your vision for expanding our Kenyan tea exports to the UK market was brilliant, Madam Director.
It inspired me to draft this proposal for tapping into the growing demand for Ghanaian cocoa in Canada.” Feed their ego while subtly showcasing your value.
Cultivate Your Ubuntu
Build a network of allies within your organization. That Zimbabwean colleague who subtly rolls her eyes during the boss’s lengthy self-aggrandizing speeches? She’s your new confidante.
Create a discreet support system where you can strategize and decompress. Meet for lunch at that small West African café near the office, but keep conversations constructive and professional.
Erect Boundaries like the Great Wall of Benin
Establish clear, respectful limits. When your boss WhatsApps at midnight about an “urgent” client request that’s not time-sensitive, respond with, “I’ve noted this priority.
I’ll address it first thing in the morning, right after our 8 AM team call.” Be firm but polite, like declining a second wrap of fufu when you’re already full.
Become a Solution Safari Guide
When challenges arise, approach your boss with a range of solutions already mapped out. “The Nigerian investors weren’t satisfied with our initial proposal, but I’ve prepared three alternative strategies, complete with projected ROIs.”
This proactive approach satisfies their need for instant gratification and positions you as an indispensable problem-solver.
Develop Skin Thicker than a Rhino’s Hide
Learn to differentiate between genuine feedback and narcissistic barbs. When your boss criticizes your public speaking skills after your presentation to the Ghanaian trade delegation, don’t internalize it.
Their words often reflect their insecurities, not their abilities. Let it slide off you like shea butter on hot skin.
Know When to Sound the Talking Drum
If your boss’s behavior crosses ethical lines – like asking you to manipulate financial reports for diaspora investors – don’t hesitate to involve HR or senior management.
Document specific incidents meticulously, including dates, times, and potential witnesses. This isn’t betrayal; it’s upholding the integrity your ancestors instilled in you.
Cultivate Your Skills Like a Master Farmer
Invest in your personal growth relentlessly. Enroll in that online course on blockchain technology and its potential applications in African remittance systems. Attend Pan-African business networking events.
Mentor that bright Cameroonian intern. Your boss may not appreciate your flourishing, but future employers will see a mighty iroko tree where your current boss sees only a sapling.
Conclusion: Signs Your Boss Might Be a Narcissist
Remember, exhibiting one or two of these traits doesn’t automatically brand your boss as a narcissist. But if you’re vigorously nodding along to most of these points, it might be time to update that LinkedIn profile.
Your peace of mind is worth more than any promised promotion or corner office with a view of Victoria Island.
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