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You’ve matched with someone on a dating app and finally scored a first date. You throw on that fierce, emerald green Ankara maxi dress with the plunging neckline that makes you feel like Beyoncé, head out with a sassy strut, and… the date goes terribly. It could be down to a variety of reasons, of course, but what if your outfit choices played a subtle role?
We Africans know the importance of rocking a statement outfit. It’s about expressing our vibrant heritage, and individuality, and feeling confident.
But could our outfit choices also be sending out signals about who we are and what we’re looking for in a partner? Let’s delve into how clothing choices can impact your relationship success.
The Psychology of Clothing: Beyond Aso Ebi
Clothes are more than just fabric and thread. They’re a form of nonverbal communication. The colors, styles, and even the cultural context of what we wear can all be interpreted by others, forming an impression before we even exchange greetings.
Think about the last time you saw someone at a lit Afrobeats party decked out in head-to-toe athletic wear from a popular sportswear brand. Did you subconsciously perceive them as someone who prioritizes fitness and a healthy lifestyle?
Or maybe someone in a dashiki with matching gele, a traditional two-piece attire worn in some West African cultures, gave off a more traditional and culturally connected vibe? Our outfit choices create a visual language that shapes how others perceive us.
Setting the Tone with Intention
Imagine you’ve landed a date for the opening night of a new exhibition showcasing contemporary African art. A flowy maxi dress in a bold Ankara print with geometric patterns and rich kente colors might signal you’re interested in cultural exploration and have a creative side.
However, showing up in ripped jeans and a barely-there crop top might send a different message altogether. It’s all about striking a balance that reflects the situation, your personality, and your cultural background. Let’s explore some specific scenarios:
Art Gallery Date
A well-tailored jumpsuit in a sophisticated Ankara print featuring a calming palette of blues and browns or a midi skirt with a statement gele in a vibrant gele print showcases your appreciation for art and African fashion. Accessorize with bold earrings or a chunky necklace made from recycled beads to add a touch of personality.
Afrobeat Club Night
A little black dress with a detachable Ankara-inspired clutch or a pair of high-waisted jeans with a chic Ankara peplum top in a celebratory red hue lets you move freely and embrace the vibrant energy of the night. Opt for comfortable shoes like platform sandals that allow you to dance the night away.
Meeting the In-Laws
Opt for a modest dress with a tasteful Ankara print that features muted colors and covers your shoulders, showing respect for your partner’s cultural background, while still expressing your unique style. Consider pairing the dress with a lightweight scarf or a cardigan for a more conservative look.
Confidence is Key: Owning Your Aso Ebi
Ultimately, the most attractive outfit is the one that makes you feel confident and authentically you. When you feel good in what you’re wearing, it radiates outward.
If a certain outfit, whether it’s a revealing crop top or a bulky sweater that makes you itch, makes you feel self-conscious, it might project insecurity and hinder your ability to connect with your date.
Communication is Key Beyond the Outfit
While outfit choices can spark initial attraction, open communication is vital for a lasting relationship. Don’t be afraid to have conversations about expectations, likes, and dislikes with your partner.
If your partner ever expresses discomfort with your outfit choices, have a heart-to-heart and adjust accordingly. Remember, fashion is a form of self-expression, but it shouldn’t be a barrier to genuine connection.
Practical Tips Outfit Choices
For Africans in the diaspora, consider ways to make the best outfit choices:
- Invest in basics that fit well and can be mixed and matched.
- Choose clothes that reflect your personality and make you feel confident.
- Dress appropriately for the occasion, but don’t be afraid to add your flair.
- Take care of your clothes. Clean, well-maintained outfits always look better.
- Experiment with colors and styles to find what works best for you.
Don’t forget about grooming and personal hygiene.
Conclusion: Can Your Outfit Choices Affect Your Love Life?
Outfit choices can play a role in attracting potential partners, but they’re not the be-all and end-all. Focus on building genuine connections, effective communication, and mutual respect. After all, the right person will love you for who you are, inside and out, regardless of what you’re wearing.
READ: Fashionable Recycling: Upcycling Old Outfits into New Trends
Ready to turn your “nothing to wear” into “everything to flaunt”? Here’s your upcycling roadmap.